One or the other: Good for Ball, Bad for Ball. You can attach either label to everything in life.
Baby food, for instance. Good for Ball. Of course. Life before baby food was invented must have sucked. Unless there were carpal tunnel syndrome surgeons back then — they’d have cleaned up.
You’ve gotta wonder about grown-ups who eat baby food, though. And they’re out there. Believe it. They claim to like it, but let’s be honest. They like attention, and cracking open a little bottle of Beech-Nut’s sweet corn/kale/spinach concoction after smaggin’ down a couple American Spirits does the trick quite nicely. Tools? Bad for Ball.
So there you go. It’s either Good for Ball or Bad for Ball. We stick to sports in this space.
• There’s a funny bit on 95.7 The Game’s midday show called “The Truth Machine,” in which sports figures’ sound bites are played, then mined for honesty by a computerized voice. Pablo Sandoval doesn’t need no stinkin’ computer. He’s his own truth machine. At the 2014 Giants’ World Series parade, he said, among other things, “I love being here. … I want to be here for the rest of my career.” Last week, months after signing with the Red Sox for less money than the Giants offered, he basically said of San Francisco, “Hated it!” Dude went from lifelong local legend to Public Enemy No. 1 with a few thoughtless sentences. What a turd. Have another doughnut, jackass. Bad for Ball.
• How about the vicious backlash against the Panda coming from the Giants clubhouse? Oh, wait. There was none. Just a bunch of shrugs. Loved that. The Giants, to a man, showed class. Wouldn’t even dignify the clown’s comments with a response. Good for them. Good for Ball.
• Aubrey Huff couldn’t resist, though. He’s going out of his way to take shots at Sandoval. Kind of sad, actually. Especially if you know how a lot of Huff’s former teammates feel about Huff himself — not dissimilar. The word “act” comes up a lot in conversation with both. Bad for Ball.
• It’s March 15, and Andrew Bogut is healthy! Good for Ball!
• The Warriors’ playoff run doesn’t start for another month or so. Bad for Ball.
• “Wedding Crashers” was Good for Ball, and actor Will Ferrell’s cameo was pure genius. “I almost nunchucked you; you don’t even realize!” might very well be the greatest single line in cinematic history. But Ferrell’s cameo for 10 teams in five spring training games Thursday, including the Giants and A’s, was vomit-inducing. Great cause and everything, but there wasn’t much funny about it, and it didn’t do much more than remind us of singer Garth Brooks being allowed to suit up for the Padres back when he was relevant. They don’t even let Make-A-Wish kids play in actual games. Bad for Ball.
• Daniel Norris is the Blue Jays’ top pitching prospect, and he’s been living in a VW van — by choice — for quite some time. He likes the simplicity, and his life choices represent a refreshing contrast to the pampered world of the typical pro. Even more refreshing is that he’s most definitely not doing it for attention. In fact, nobody even knew he was a fitter, more together version of Matt Foley until this spring. Good for Ball.
• Google Norris’ name and you’ll find about a million links to fresh stories about him and the van. The secret is out, and now the guy seeking simplicity is being featured in People magazine, for crying out loud. Before you know it, the guy’s gonna be in a stupid Kanye West video. Bad for Ball.
Mychael Urban has been covering Bay Area sports for 25 years and has worked for MLB.com, Comcast SportsNet Bay Area and KNBR (680 AM).