Frantz: Big Brown was just as good a lock as Hillary

A little of this, and a lot of that …

» You think if David Stern were in charge of competitive thoroughbred racing that Big Brown would be left with nary a bucket of oats to his name this week? You know, with the NBA pledging to administer fines against players who flop, and all.

» I mean, seriously, when’s the last time you saw a stone-cold lock, a lead-pipe cinch of a favorite, come crashing down at the hands of a young upstart like that? I mean … other than Hillary Clinton?

» So what do you think? Should Da’ Tara have Big Brown serve as “Vice Belmont Winner” for the next four years — just in the interest of Equine Party unity?

» Not to beat Paul Pierce down after his Game 1 injury in the NBA Finals, but that must have been some divine intervention that allowed him to burst back onto the court just minutes after being life-flighted to the Celtic locker room. Was that Celtics trainer Mr. Miyagi I saw rubbing his hands together briskly while following Pierce down the tunnel on Thursday?

» You know, there’s an old rule that most athletes have learned and lived by since junior high. Perhaps Pierce wasn’t aware of it for some reason — because it’s an unwritten rule — but it might as well be carved in stone, and it goes something like this: If game officials have to actually stop a game and summon other people to help carry your lifeless carcass off the field (or court) of battle, you’d damn well better be hospitalized. If the fans in attendance all have to give you the polite, “We’re glad you’re okay!” applause as you’re wheeled off to triage, then there’s no popping off the bench 2 minutes later and bounding back into the contest.

» Giants manager Bruce Bochy won’t confirm it, but team doctors are privately whispering that Barry Zito’s performance this season may be due, at least in part, to a cracked hoof.

» Hey Rick Dutrow Jr., what can Brown do for you? You know, other than make you look like a smarmy, overconfident, egotistical jackass?

» After yet another loss to Rafael Nadal on the clay courts of Paris, tennis fans can officially stop trying to convince us that Roger Federer is the most dominant individual performer in sports. Federer is good friends with Tiger Woods, but that’s about where the comparison should end. The only way for Federer to be in that conversation would be for Woods to have 13 major championships while going 0-for-Augusta. The great ones win not only anywhere … but everywhere.

» You know, even if someone had offered me odds, I wouldn’t have bet that Sarah Jessica Parker’s face would’ve been smiling brighter than Big Brown’s this weekend, but there it is. That filly sure made off with a few carrots at the box office, huh?

» Look, I’m not saying Paul Pierce wasn’t hurt in Game 1, but if Willis Reed wanted to introduce the Celtics’ captain to the back of his hand, I’d offer to hold him.

» I don’t want to alarm anyone in Raider Nation, but Rick Dutrow Jr. just declared Darren McFadden’s winning of the NFL Rookie of the Year award a “foregone conclusion.” Uh oh.

Sports personality Bob Frantz is a regular contributor to The Examiner. E-mail him at bfrantz@sfexaminer.com.

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