Ain't no time to wait – if you love the Dead

If only I had time for another life I could be wading, in and out of the garden on a drop of dew – on the taxpayer’s dime.

But such apparently is not my fate because I don’t have time to go back and get a master’s degree in Library Science, the one thing keeping me from joining my namesake Jerry Garcia in recorded history.

That’s what is stopping me from a potential dream job at the University of California Santa Cruz, which, in the best academic tie-dyed tradition, is searching for someone to be the official archivist for the Grateful Dead. And if you think I’m making it up, all I can say is I don’t write fiction.

According to the online posting, the university’s library is seeking an “enterprising, creative and service-oriented archivist’’ to join the staff of the Special Collections unit as the person organizing the famed San Francisco rock band’s history.

“This is a potential career status position,’’ the listing reads, as if we didn’t know.

The job requires a Master’s in Library Science and a “love of the Grateful Dead,’’ which probably means there will be thousands of librarians fighting soon to get on the Golden Road to Unlimited Devotion, among other career tracks.

Just two more years of college, and I could have been a contender. What a dead head.
 

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