3-Minute Interview: Anna Post

The great-great-granddaughter of etiquette expert Emily Post has a new book, “Emily Post’s Wedding Parties,” which includes the proper ways of hosting wedding get-togethers. Post is in S.F. on Saturday at 1 Fort Mason, where from 10 a.m. to noon she will share tips and take questions. For more information, visit www.amynichols.com.

Wait, who pays for the bachelor party? There’s two different ways that this could happen. The most common one I see is the people who are throwing it let people know that you pay for yourself and cover the bride and groom. There is the exception to this that the bride or groom is very wealthy and pays for everyone to fly to a place like Las Vegas. Just be clear up front who is paying for what.

How late is too late to buy someone a wedding gift? Never. That being said, try and do it before the wedding or try and bring it to the wedding. And vice versa for thanking someone for a wedding gift. People hold those grudges a long time.

How do couples balance their wants with the phrase, “Your parents had the wedding their parents wanted, and you’ll have the wedding your parents wanted”? There’s a phrase we use, “You can’t hold people hostage just because you’re contributing.” … On the flip side, the couple has to be respectful of the budget. It goes both ways in terms of being respectful.

Why a wedding book now? As a wedding parties book, it complements the big book of wedding etiquette, but it wasn’t answering all these questions we were getting about engagement parties, bachelor parties, etc., at least not in depth. It touched on them, but we really wanted to highlight them.

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