Snooki's handcrafted oddities a hit on Etsy.com

Good news: Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi has opened her own Etsy.com shop, just in time for Christmas. Bad news: On Wednesday, Polizzi declared herself “SOLD OUT!” Best news: Consider yourself lucky, because Polizzi's tacky trinkets are something only a third-grader could love.

“So excited to have finally opened up my own etsy store!” she gushes on her page on the popular marketplace for crafters. “Hope you guys enjoy my stuff, because I LOVE making everything offered here!”

Screenshots taken Wednesday document the objects of the former “Jersey Shore” star's affection: crudely decorated mugs, candles and wine glasses.

“You're the Jwoww to my Snooki” Polizzi's girlish handwriting screams on one mug ($30), which is accented with a practical tuft of tulle (the mug was hastily redone after a customer pointed out Polizzi had misspelled “you're”). Jenni “Jwoww” Farley co-stars on MTV's “Snooki & Jwoww.”

“This makes me poop,” chirps the writing on another mug, presumably referring to coffee it will one day hold and not the shoddy craftsmanship. The artist also managed to cram “Wine is like Pringles. Once you pop, you just can't stop” onto a wine glass ($25).

It's no Crate&Barrel, but the online store sold 159 items after opening Dec. 3 (including several of the $30 poop mugs). The priciest item? “UNITY CANDLES!” for $100 a pop.

Polizzi, who had her second child with husband Jionni LaValle in September, may not know how to spell “you're,” but she's definitely not stupid.

QUICK TAKES

“Problem” singer Ariana Grande is denying Life & Style magazine's report that she insists on being “literally carried like a baby” by staff members when she's too tired to walk. … The auction of a letter from Beat hero Neal Cassady to author Jack Kerouac has been put on hold after the estates of both men claimed ownership of the 16,000-word document, which influenced Kerouac's “On the Road.” … “Scandal” and “Grey's Anatomy” creator Shonda Rhimes credited pioneering women in Hollywood after receiving an award at the Hollywood Reporter's annual Women in Entertainment breakfast on Wednesday. … May 20 will be David Letterman's final day hosting “The Late Show,” CBS announced Wednesday. Stephen Colbert is taking over the gig.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Raiders safety Tyvon Branch is 28. … Rapper-actor Mos Def is 41. … Actor Max Martini (“The Unit”) is 45. … Actress Mo'Nique (“The Parkers”) is 47. … Bassist Nikki Sixx of Mötley Crüe is 56. … Actress Teri Garr (“Tootsie”) is 67. … Singer Brenda Lee is 70. … Actress Rita Moreno (“West Side Story”) is 83.

Got scoops or Bay Area celebrity gossip? Email scoop@sfexaminer.com.

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