Insane Clown Posse tells FBI they’re gangsters … of love

Getty Images File PhotoBad rap: Violent J

The Insane Clown Posse’s “Carnival of Carnage” continues its bewitchingly lame procession, this time by filing a lawsuit against the FBI.

The National Gang Threat Assessment task force apparently dubbed ICP fans (known as Juggalos) a “loosely organized hybrid gang,” likening it to the Aryan Brotherhood or the Norteños.

Apparently, inspiring overweight suburbanite males to paint their faces like Bozo, drink grape Faygo and rap about “butts” is akin to murdering a snitch’s entire family.

“You’re trying to grow love in your country and s***,” Shaggy 2 Dope told Gawker. “Then the head of your country — the FBI — just turns around and f***ing kicks you in the nuts.”

The real question is, where were the feds when America was being invaded by the Kiss Army?

Honky chateau

It’s no surprise to “Bachelor” fans that the next lucky fella will be Sean Lowe, the Christian blond dude from the last season of “The Bachelorette.” The real surprise is in the line-up of ladies.

The show has gotten flak for being as lily-white as the Republican National Convention. Sure, they usually throw in one person of color, but that nonwhite contestant is usually axed in the first round, sort of like the black guy who dies in the first twenty minutes of a ’70s horror movie.

So when the network unveiled not one, not two, but four women of color in the roster for Lowe’s season, it came as a welcome surprise. ABC may just overcome, after all.

Don’t Tap dat

Hast thou heard of “butt-chugging?” All the kids are doing it … or more like a few dopes. In fact, it even landed one Tennessee collegian in the ER last weekend.

All you do is insert wine into your rectum, which absorbs the booze fast, with no pesky aftertaste.

 According to Knoxnews.com, officers arrived on the scene and found several young men at the Pi Kappa Alpha house passed out in their rooms, “and bags from wine boxes, some empty and some partially empty, strewn across the halls and rooms.”

Ah, youth. Only a frat guy would look at a hose coming out of a box of wine and think, “Enema!”

QUICK TAKES

  • HBO passed on David Simon’s spinoff of “The Wire” called “The Hall,” which focused on Mayor Carcetti.
  • J.K. Rowling said that though she hates sequels, she could pen another book in the Harry Potter universe.
  • Charlie Sheen is hawking a blackjack game app on Twitter. Headline: “Winning!”
  • Kelly Osbourne wore a diamond-dusted $250,000 manicure to the Emmys.
  • Dog the Bounty Hunter has a new show, and it’s a take on revamping flailing bail bond businesses.

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