Charlie Sheen talks ‘epic’ drug use, ‘Men’ 

We’re not sure what is fueling Charlie Sheen these days — the actor just passed a drug test with flying colors — but as he becomes increasingly unhinged, he is certainly coming up with some one-of-a-kind one-liners. Here are some of the more head-scratching Charlie quotes from his recent interviews.

To NBC, he declared, “I’m tired of pretending like I’m not special. I’m tired of pretending like I’m not a total freaking rock star from Mars. And people can’t figure me out. They can’t process me. I don’t expect them to. You can’t process me with a normal brain.”

Of the production company behind “Two and a Half Men,” which recently halted production after Sheen insulted its creator, Charlie asserted, “Come Wednesday morning, they’re going to rename it Charlie Bros., not Warner Bros.” He plans to sue the company and CBS, which airs (or aired) the show, and says he’ll return to work for $3 million per episode.

Asked by ABC about reports he might suffer from bipolar disorder, the actor responded, “What does that mean? What’s the cure? Medicine? Make me like them? Not gonna happen. I’m bi-winning. I win here. I win there.”

Though fessing up to taking “more [drugs] than anybody could survive,” and boasting that “the run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards just look like droopy-eyed armless children,” Charlie claimed, “Dying’s for fools. There are certain blends I will not entertain because that’s how people go down.”

And our personal favorite: “I am on a drug — it’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available. If you try it once, you will die.”

Quite the public service announcement.

Thrilled About Chace

Two Hollywood up-and-comers may have found love on the set. Emma Roberts and Chace Crawford, co-stars in last year’s “Twelve,” appeared to be very much into each other at Elton John’s Oscars party Sunday night, according to Us.

The pair reportedly shared three cigarette breaks outside, at one point re-entering the event holding hands. And when the actress chatted with other celebs at the bar, she kept her eyes on the “Gossip Girl” cutie.

“Emma is clearly smitten with Chace,” an onlooker opined. “They weren’t making out, but you could tell they had a definite chemistry and were into one another.”

Ah, to be young and in love — and invited to Elton John’s Oscars party!

Stunt Casting?

When we first heard the news that Angelina Pivarnick’s beau had dropped to one knee and proposed — on the red carpet at an event, while photographers snapped away — we immediately suspected a publicity stunt. And a source close to the “Jersey Shore” star’s fiance, Dave Kovacs, told Radar Online the engagement was indeed a hoax.

“They aren’t even friends on Facebook,” Dave’s pal says. “The whole thing is weird.”

But Angelina insists the betrothal is legit, telling E! the “hoax” rumor was stirred up by a former friend.

“She’s in love with [Dave],” declares the outspoken Staten Island native. “She says I stole him from her; she says she was dating him but they were never dating. His mom tried to hook them up, but he was never attracted to her.

 “This is going to come to an end,” says Angelina. “Me and him are getting married and it’s strong and that’s it.”
Sheer poetry!

Kitty Raymond is an entertainment writer and astrologer. She welcomes feedback at kitty@media-darling.com.

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