From the way Eva Longoria opened up about her divorce from Tony Parker on “Piers Morgan Tonight,” you’d never have guessed that she has already moved on to a hot new man.
“It was devastating to go through on its own, much less publicly,” the “Desperate Housewives” star said of her split from the basketballer.
“Marriage in my family is really a sacred sacrament,” said Eva, who is now hot and heavy with Penelope Cruz’s younger brother Eduardo Cruz, 25. “It wasn’t something we did frivolously. And our mantra was, divorce is not an option. We always would kid about that — ‘I’ll kill him before I divorce him!’”
Still, “I do not regret getting married nor do I regret getting divorced,” the 36-year-old actress declared, though she admitted the split was “heartbreaking.”
“It was disappointing because I had such an identity in being Mrs. Parker and being a wife,” Eva explained. “When that’s taken away from you, you go, ‘Who am I?’”
A woman with a hot younger boyfriend, that’s who! (No, honey, we won’t call you a cougar. That would be a cheap shot.)
Be afraid, be very afraid: The “Jersey Shore” cast may start breeding. Yes, you read that right: Jenni “J-Woww” Farley is so in love with her boyfriend, she’s ready to start a family.
“I didn’t realize how happy I could be in a relationship,” the bodacious reality star gushed to “Life & Style” of Roger Matthews, her main squeeze of nine months.
“Hopefully I’ll be able to settle down and have kids within the next couple of years — maybe even the beginning of next year,” the self-proclaimed Guidette predicted. “I don’t see myself going to the shore in the next five years or so. I don’t want to jinx it — I haven’t really talked about it — but it would be nice.”
But will their relationship survive the “Jersey Shore” crew’s trip to Italy for the show’s fourth season?
“It might be hard, but I think it’ll make us stronger,” opined J-Woww. “I’m going to make sure he can visit at least once or twice, even for just 24 hours.”
Breathe a big sigh of relief: We’re thinking this couple won’t make it long enough to produce offspring.
Nicole Richie is shooting down rumors that she’s expecting her third child. The newlywed mom of Harlow and Sparrow is miffed that recent photos of her gave rise to baby bump buzz.
“Contrary to recent speculation, I am not pregnant,” the newly minted Mrs. Joel Madden declared in a statement. “This irresponsible reporting continues to feed an atmosphere of self-doubt and insecurity.”
The socialite, whose super-skinny frame has in the past been the subject of eating-disorder concerns, was photographed in a loose tee that seemed to suggest a subtle tummy bulge.
“To publicly point out a change in anyone’s body is mean-spirited and cruel,” Nicole fumed. “People’s bodies change and change again. This is not newsworthy and is a waste of valuable media space that should be used for more important issues.”
A little high and mighty, granted. But how would you feel if the media was jumping to unkind conclusions about your midsection?
Kitty Raymond is an entertainment writer and astrologer. She welcomes feedback at firstname.lastname@example.org.