Seth McFarlane might have been a sucky Oscars host, but it’s not like he writes all the jokes. Jesse Joyce scribes a large bulk of them and has made a tradition out of tweeting the ones the Academy rejected:

 “Brokeback was abt gay lovers & in Life of Pi Ang champions the lesbian cause b/c the main character’s afraid of dying alone w/ a cat.”

 “Zero Dark Thirty filmed in India-Locals were mad it was used to represent Pakistan & that Bin Laden didnt have a 20 min dance number."

 “Tommy Lee Jones is a kind and generous person to work for. This past December he gave Bob Cratchit the whole day off on Christmas.”

 “The whole time I watched Denzel in Flight I thought - what an amazing actor & why haven’t they made band aids for black people yet?”

 “Don Johnson was great in Django. He hasn’t used the “N” word that much since his days shooting Miami Vice.”

 Quick Takes

• Perhaps in honor of Black History Month, Donald Trump says that “Django Unchained” is the “most racist movie.”

• The producer of “Best Animated Short Film” was booted from the Oscars for throwing paper airplanes.

• No one is quite sure who invited Brandi Glanville to the Oscars.

•  Yup, Jack Nicholson hit on Jennifer Lawrence while she was being interviewed post-ceremony by George Stephanopoulos.

•  Instagram told Madonna that she better clean up her act and stop posting pics that violate its community guidelines.

•  The Onion made a rare apology to 9-year-old nominee Quevenzhané Wallis for a vulgar tweet about her that it sent out during the Oscars.

Celebrity Birthday:

• Actress Teresa Palmer (“Warm Bodies”) is 27.
• Actor Shiloh Fernandez (“Red Riding Hood”) is 28.
• Singer Corinne Bailey Rae is 34.
• Singer Erykah Badu is 42.
• Former Giants first baseman J.T. Snow is 45.
• Singer Michael Bolton is 60.
• Mystery writer Elizabeth George is 64.
• Musician Mitch Ryder is 68.
• Actor Bill Duke (“Car Wash”) is 70.
• R&B legend Fats Domino is 85.