Kate Middleton’s sister, Pippa, might have the world’s greatest derriere, but that doesn’t make her Martha Stewart with a good butt.

In October, she published “Celebrate — A Year Of British Festivities For Family and Friends.” The book has completely flopped, according to several sources. The socialite reportedly received a nearly $650,000 advance to share her tips for entertaining in the 400-page tome.

However, that’s where the money train ends. The poor sales might have something to do with its review in the Daily Mail and other British papers, which pointed out her less than creative ideas — such as putting ice in drinks (seriously!), hollowing out a pumpkin on Halloween and putting soup in it (unheard of!) and serving turkey at Christmas gatherings (maverick!).